This list has been designed to give me numerous pastoral care experiences. I've got two of my people that are supposed to die within the next two months. Some who have just been moved to the facility. One who is 107 years old. Some who have obvious and outspoken faith, others whom the chaplain didn't know if they were believers or not.
I was even given one person who is on the dementia ward. She confuses her past with the present so her stories sound more like halucinations than anything else.
This time continues to be a struggle for me. I struggle to offer the same presence in a room with a person who is incoherent and seemingly halucinating, to a room that I enter and they immediately become upbeat and request much from me.
I was asked to be one lady's son today. She had fallen 10 minutes before I showed up and had just finished getting lifted back into her bed when I walked in. She demanded prayer the moment I introduced myself. She then grabbed my hand, told me of her "informal relationship" with God and cried as she told me parts of her story and family. It was very easy to be present in that room.
I understand that this experience will help me provide pastoral care in the future, but find myself with anxiety everytime I remember that I have to go back for 4 hours again next Wednesday. These times drain me.
What a stressing and stretching assignment! Most people only have these types of experiences with loved ones (relatives) in their families with whom they already have a personal relationship. That is hard enough, to meet and try to relate with those where no previous relationship is hard to imagine. It's difficult and obviously stressing. Hopefully, you joy and respite you bring to those who are in need will help sustain you during this and in the future and help mitigate the feelings you may get with those who don't seem to benefit from such benefits. When you see how much a visit can help someone in these circumstances, it helps. May God sustain you and support you in these efforts.
ReplyDeletePastoral care is very draining. In some ways, you are allowing people to give you their burdens and in that sharing, the burden feels lighter to them but is now weighty to you. That is why there is also a need for pastors to be pastored. You may never know what an impact you make on one of these people but I am c onficent that an impact will be made.
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