Guilty Shopping

It is amazing how sometimes I can feel guilty over spending money.

Yesterday (Monday) I made two purchases with my credit card. Both were for $6 and both were for consumable items.

The first was at a coffee shop, paying for two.

The second, McDonald's for one.

Never remorse or guilt for the first.

Lingering guilt for the second.

The guilt can't be written off because of fast food, or its health or nutritional value, I still have no shame in eating fast food. Rather, I felt guilty because I spent this money without any need or great benefit. It was easier than making my own food, quicker, more convenient, even tastier.

Even so, the majority of the guilt came because I knew it was an impulse purchase made to comfort my emotions and desires.

The coffee was not. I rarely buy coffee. I never buy coffee for one. I hate coffee. I didn't even buy myself coffee, I bought a vanilla steamer, my usual coffee shop drink. This purchase was made out of generosity, out of giving, and out of a desire to show the value to me of the time spent with my company.

I wish I didn't do any of the guilty shopping. I can say that without having to say I wish I didn't ever buy fast food. There are plenty of times I can buy fast food and not feel guilty about it. Monday was not one of those days.