Johann Sebastian Bach (long post)

Suite No. 3 In B Minor, BWV 814, IV. Menuett - Trio

Any of you who know me well will understand that my taste in music is rarely classical. This post, actually, has nothing to do with music. However, this song (or is it called a movement, I slept through a lot of music appreciation in college, something I don't regret) is perhaps the most relaxing music I ever get to hear. I don't listen to it on CD, or in my car, or while I shower. In fact, I don't even listen to a professional orchestra, or studio recording of this movement, I listen to it in 8 bit Midi format while I play Tetris on my original Nintendo (it's music choice "C").

Many people chose to start a game of Tetris on level zero and see how high they can get. Some pick a level that is more accustomed to their skill so as not to get bored by how slow the first few levels really are. Those more bold start on level nine, the highest visibly seen starting level, and test there luck against a game that most people get frustrated with. I am a unique (read weird and twisted) individual however, and have found that even the speed of level nine is slow and boring for me. I have to start on the unseen level (if you hold down the "a" button it adds ten to the starting level) and skip straight to its highest starting point of nineteen. There aren't a lot of people who enjoy the game at this pace. So few even, that when you acquire enough lines to move to the next level, they don't increase the speed. The only other increase of speed is when you reach level 29 and the game actually becomes impossible. I can sit for hours and play level nineteen of Tetris. Somehow, piecing the lines together is relaxing for my mind at a pace that most people find infuriating to theirs.

Tetris is a game of decision making. At level nineteen, it is a game of quick decision making. Time to think is limited and mistakes are frequent. People are fascinated when they watch me make mistakes on purpose because it was my first choice and the time to think of a better option just wasn't there. What is funny to me, is that it isn't these wrong decisions that will cause me to lose control of my thinking and thus the game, it is when one of two things happen that I know there is no turning back.

(you may want to start noticing that some of these points aren't just about a video game, but can be applied to life)

The first thing that can cause me to lose a game of Tetris is when something unexpected happens. If I believe I am finished with moving a piece and it moves while I'm assuming control of the next one, my brain cannot catch up quickly enough to evaluate the situation. I find myself trying to regroup at a time when I need to be making a decision, and lose all control of the game.

The second thing that causes me to lose a game of Tetris is when I am struck with a case of indecision. I stated earlier that it is often better for me just to intentionally make a mistake and move on to using the next pieces to fix my mistake than it is for me to watch a piece fall without any rhyme or reason. Indecision causes me not to be able to focus on what is ahead, and at the pace of this game (or the pace of life) not being able to see what's coming can put you into a cycle that is hard to get out of.

A professor in college once used an analogy about cars, to describe the process of discerning what God's plans are for our lives. When faced with a couple of different possibilities that could all be there right path of life, he said this.

It is better to turn down the wrong path than it is to sit at the intersection without making a decision. You can almost always tell when you have made the wrong decision and turn around and correct it, but indecision will often cause an accident, or just road rage.

This is the thing that resonated most with me from that entire class (a study on the book of Romans).

I've been fortunate enough in life to be quick and able in making decisions. I've made my share of wrong decisions, but am comfortable when the pressures on that I will be confident in the decisions I've made. Be it skipping straight to level nineteen in Tetris, performing in competitive soccer games, or starting and finishing a senior project the weekend before it is due, I've had an ability to perform under pressure. Some see it as a gift, and I can agree. Others see it as a product of a life of procrastinating, of which I'm also guilty. Some are envious of the ability, but most never want to be in the situation to use it. I love it.

I'm not in any way trying to pass off that life should be lived without thinking, I have probably spent more time thinking than most people. I even know the best ways to win hypothetical arguments with myself, or form theories on the possibility (or my belief in the lack thereof) of perfect Tetris playing lasting forever (I think perfect play is destined to lose and can prove it scientifically). The point isn't about not thinking. The point is that we need to be prepared to make decisions when we are called to make them.

Most of my thinking is done in advance. There aren't a lot of question I wouldn't be comfortable answering. I don't know entirely what the point of this blog was, but if you have any kinds of questions (specifically questions about my life, or about my God) I would be more than happy to engage in conversation with you. I can't promise good or correct answers, but I know I'm not afraid to converse with you. I'd love to dialogue. Feel free to e-mail or comment.