More Pessimistic Than I Knew

I've always had a negative outlook. I'm more likely to analyze and critique than celebrate and encourage.

This was made abundantly clear to me when in our all day staff meeting, I got bored while we were "celebrating" and thanking God for the good things of last year.  All I wanted to do was jump the analysis, changes, and improvement portions of reflection.

I wanted to leave celebration and enter tension.  While I'm not excited about a desire to "leave celebration" there is something that feels comforable inside with the "entering tension" portion.  It used to be something I avoided, but as my confidence in myself has grown, my aversion to tension has diminished.

I know its the pessimism talking, but I'm comfortable in the tension!